WHAT? You’re not in PARADISE?!? (Well, atleast you’re not stripped of your entire mountaintop life & title!)
People may ask me, “Why are you sharing this personal part of your life, on a blog that anyone can read……” And my answer to that is: ” This is the reality of living life the way we are – An adventuresome couple, in the most unbelievable place of our dreams – dealing with the awesome and then, not so much.” Because, in truth, no matter where you are in life, physically, or mentally, the blues can settle in. Some say, “Suck it up and go on”. My friends in Paris would exclaim..”Marti, it’s been a constant gray drizzle since September!! -And you’re in the glorious SUN by the Med??!! – GET A GRIP!!” Then there’s the writing down of things – perhaps, using process of elimination lists, and if that doesn’t work, try looking at photos and see which ones make you cry. Then, you might be on the right track.
Amidst the stunning vistas, glorious art work, magnificent architecture, crazy, luny adventures, and price-tag reporting of things in France, I, – me, – moi, your writer of this blog, am/is suffering a severe case of the blues. Just to note, during these times, I’m thankful to God for my life, for all that I’ve been blessed with and even for the blues……….it’s hard to do sometimes, but I do it anyway…….
Iris turned 2 this month, and to me, it was momentous – alas, from afar.
PLUS, I’ve had a very good friend visit me here in Cassis where we did a thousand things – all the way along the Cote d’Azur, ( the French Riviera,) to Saint Tropez , Monaco, Monte Carlo, and even into Italy. But I have to say – – – I almost got back on the plane with her this morning – across the big blue ocean – to visit my home in Saint Louis to get some major cuddle time with Iris and play time with the other 3 incredible grands.
I miss them so much my heart breaks. I also miss Charlie. (My cat.) This is the other side of the coin in being a “fun loving senior doing the out of the ordinary – living in France kind of life.” For when you do something this audacious, moving 7,000 miles away, across the Atlantic and sitting close to the Mediterranean , no matter how beautiful it really is – there is always that tug at your heart for what you have left. Yes, there is work here, Yes, we need the income, yes, we tried to get hired at our ages in the United States of America, and NO, neither one of us could find those jobs, but they existed here – of all places. (What my husband has accomplished here with the job and the ensuing bureaucracy , he deserves some sort of medal. I could never be here without him and what he has accomplished!! Whew! ) And, I could easily leave parts of where I live in the US behind, but I cannot leave my children and their children without it causing me sadness many times. So, children, if you are reading this, take it to heart……YOU ARE MISSED!!!!! I also miss my neighbor and my few friends. I’m also very sorry about the verdict coming down this day on Lance Armstrong……….sad sad. Sometimes persons‘ woes are infinitesimal small, some are tragedies, some are deeply personal, but all are the biggest thing to the person that is experiencing it. It’s not comparable.
Just wanted to put that out there.
That’s all she wrote on this day, the 22nd of October, 2012.
Oh, and the “list”
Things I Miss –
1) Larger living area, 2) easy to access music 3) English-speaking movies on demand-Netflix 4) memory foam topper 5)reasonably priced face creams (nix that – my friend just brought me a BUNCH!!) 6) my large kitchen 7) a comfortable big couch
Things I don’t miss:
The STUFF in my house, the COLD, the media/political garbage, the garden upkeep, (my knees thank me), the reality that I never walk when I’m back at my home, driving absolutely everywhere
Things that make me cry:
Photos of Iris and the other 3 grands, Charlie (the cat), the kids